Self-bullying is an unfortunate habit for those who are constantly trying to psyche themselves up to deal with pain and other symptoms of their disease and illnesses. Your self defeating thoughts might sound like this:
Don't be a wuss, it's just a headache.
If other people can survive illnesses, you can get thru this.
You just need to relax and take deep breaths.
I will not be the loser who cancels on her friends for the second night in a row!
Do you bully yourself? I think we all fall into that category at times. I used to do it all the time to myself when I first got sick. I had to learn to set healthier boundaries.
Ilana Jacqueline talks further about how our self talk either builds us up or tears us down.
"Once again you are cancelling out on your friends."
"I hope that next week, I will feel like going."
If you judge yourself as weak or incompetent for having a flare up, you make it impossible to cultivate the self esteem that you need to deal with the reality that your disease will flare up. How we see ourselves starts how others see us.
The author shares how at age 14, she'd gone from size double zero to a 7 in the span of 2 months due to a new medication. It was so depressing at that age, especially. There were only certain foods that I could handle. Medications have uchy side effects, we know that. Steroids, a very common treatment for those with autoimmune diseases can result in a "moon face", due to weight gain in the face. It's just not fair.
But practice in setting healthier boundaries for oneself can definitely result in more energy, and less no's to your social life.
"Tomorrow I am staying home, and running no errands."
"So that hopefully I can go out with friends on Saturday night."
Practice this.
Practice learning to limit your errands.
For myself, I always had unlimited energy to run around. I think this will always bother me. And that's ok!! It took me a good while to realize that I was very angry at myself about letting myself down!! Those realizations are key steps in self awareness and healing.
From Me to U!
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